Many people aim to take charge of their own development. There may be times in our lives, however, when we may be helped by people who provide encouragement or act as positive models.
Harry Stack Sullivan, the psychiatrist, expounded on this theme. He described how we may be helped by what he called – in the original meaning of the phrase – significant others.
These may be parents, grandparents, teachers, coaches or others who play a significant role in our lives. Some people from troubled backgrounds, for example, describe how such people helped them in their lives.
Such people can play a key role during our childhood, teenage years or early working lives. They help us to believe in ourselves and, when appropriate, help us to see practical ways we can shape a positive future.
Looking back, can you think of a person who may have played such a role in your life? What was the name of the person? What did they do to encourage or help you? What else do you remember about the person?
If you wish, try tackling the exercise on this theme. This invites you to complete the following sentences.
Ian Wright, the former Arsenal and England footballer, often talks about how he received such help from one of his teachers, Sydney Pigden. Many years later they met when Ian was making a television programme.
The producers invited Sydney along to pay a surprise visit. Ian later recounted what he had gained from his teacher. Here is a summary of what he said.
“Mr Pigden had a massive impact on me. For me he will remain the greatest man in the world. He was a guiding light all the way through my career, as people saw in the video when I was reunited with him.
“I dedicated my book to him and I think that was the least I could do for somebody that literally turned my life around, in respect to teaching me how to be a decent human being.
“I met him when I was seven, so we’re talking about 50 years ago, and it was because I wasn’t being particularly good in class.
“I wasn’t able to learn as quickly as the rest of the kids were. So he gave me responsibilities, like a registered a milk monitor, you know, things like that. Then when I started playing football, he really backed me.
“I don’t know why he chose me. I’m glad that he did. Once he come in, everything was so much better.
“I used to collect the registers from the teachers. Then they made me milk monitor. I really liked that. It was really good. I just felt important.
Let’s return to your own life and work. If appropriate, can you think of ways you may be able to encourage or help people in a potentially significant way?
You may be able to do this with one person or with more people. If so, how may you be able to do this in your own way? What may happen as a result of taking these steps?
If you wish, try tackling the exercise on this theme. This invites you to complete the following sentences.
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