People like to feel in control. They like to feel able to take charge of shaping their future lives. Sometimes they can experience difficulties, however, if they feel things are beyond their control.
Today it is more common to hear people talking about controlling the controllables. The phrase is often used by athletes, but many people are applying the philosophy in their daily lives.
People may cross an emotional threshold in their lives, for example, when they choose to focus on what they can control. They opt for this route, rather than worrying about what they can’t control. Some find this approach to be liberating. One person said:
“Several years ago I had a health scare. Fortunately I got wonderful treatment, but it also taught me a lesson.
“Nowadays I put my energies into the things I can control. This means choosing to have a positive attitude, encouraging other people and doing satisfying work.
“In the past I often worried about events beyond my control. Sometimes I used to spread gloom and doom, which was self-indulgent.
“These days I count my blessings. Each day is a bonus and I try to do my best to help other people.”
Controlling the controllables is an approach that can be used by individuals, teams or organisations. People can then focus their energies on the things they can do to shape their future lives.
If you wish, try tackling the exercises on this theme. These invite you to do the following things.
Describe the specific things you can control in your personal and professional life.
You may say, for example, that you can aim to have a take care of your health, eat healthy food and exercise. You can choose to have a positive attitude, be professional and make good use of the talents you have been given.
You can aim to encourage other people and help them to build on their strengths. You can spread hope and do your best to build a better world.
Describe the specific things you can’t control in your personal and professional life – though you may do your best to manage them.
You can’t control whether or not or you get an illness, though you can do everything possible to stay healthy. You can’t control what people think of you, though you can try do you best to build a good reputation.
You can’t control your employers or the job market. You can’t control everything that happens in the world, though you can control your attitude towards these things.
Imagine that you have explored these themes. The next step is one that many people find helps them to manage their emotions and shape their future lives.
Such people choose to build on what they can control in their personal and professional lives. They also find ways to manage some of the things that they can’t control.
Many people find this approach to be liberating. They put their energy into doing positive things in their lives. They also find ways to stop reacting to some of the things they cannot change.
If you wish, try tackling the exercise on this theme. This invites you to do the following things.
Describe specific things you can do to build on what you can control and manage what you can’t control in your personal and professional life.
Describe the specific things that may happen as a result of taking this approach in your personal and professional life.
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